When you forget your mistakes, you are doomed to repeat them. As a parolee, I do not have the luxury of room for making mistakes.
Only three short months out from behind the foreboding walls of the fortress by the bay, the venerable San Quentin State Prison, I flagrantly broke the law!
I got a ticket for not using my seatbelt. And certainly I knew better. I mean, it’s hard to forget that you’re a parolee. Nonetheless, I didn’t buckle up and the local constabulary wasted little time in serving me up a painful reminder.
It’s only going to cost me a paltry $13, a fix-it ticket. It won’t even count as points against my driving record. It could have been so much worse, and such a ticket is often written up as an infraction costing much more than $13.
The most important lesson to be learned here is that it didn’t have to happen at all. And the critical part of the lesson is that all police contact must be reported within the first 24 hours. My parole agent had to be notified.
What would he say? Even more important, WHAT WOULD HE DO ABOUT IT?! I couldn’t help but be reminded that it didn’t have to come to this at all. I had allowed myself to slip on that all-important State Of Mind that all parolees must live with, constantly, if we are to beat the odds of that damning 73 percent recidivism rate.
Stuff like this that happens all the time to “normal” folks. Though quite inconsequential in their lives, it can be catastrophic to us, quickly resulting in a return trip behind the prison walls.
The truly sad thing is that this whole potentially parole-endangering mess just didn’t have to happen at all if I had remained focused on the immutable fact that never changes in my life today: I am a Parolee.
When I allow myself to overlook that predicament then I am doomed to mistakes and inevitable failure. Failure for me as a parolee, means a trip back behind the walls. Who, really, do I have to blame if that should happen to me? Only myself!
By the grace of God, I have an experienced parole officer who simply made a note in the log noting my mental slip-up. It could have been so much worse.
But I’ve learned! Not only do I always immediately buckle up behind the wheel now, but also I try very hard to remain focused on my status as a parolee.
It’s tough to beat parole. There are very long odds for us against success, even longer odds to realize that dream of an early 13-month release from parole.
But I remain convinced, perhaps now more than ever, that I am going to make it. Three months down and 10 to go!
