By A. Torrez, KidCAT Sponsor

Sponsoring and supporting the KidCAT group has been richly rewarding, bringing me a deep sense of joy and purpose. Watching incarcerated individuals commit to inner-directed examination and understanding, while confronting difficult truths, has been inspirational. There’s something powerful about witnessing a person realize that their worst mistake does not define them, that healing and change is possible. Seeing that transformation unfold each week reminds me why this work matters. It’s not just about rehabilitation, but also about restoration of humanity. To be a part of that has been incredibly moving.

Witnessing the growth of others in this program has helped me apply this curriculum to myself.  Until I joined the KidCAT program, I did not realize how much my past was controlling me. KidCAT isn’t your typical self-help group. It doesn’t offer surface-level solutions or ask us to just “do better.” It invites participants to go back to their roots and understand how childhood trauma, violence, abandonment, and early life experiences shaped behaviors. To be vulnerable may seem dangerous to many, but the KidCAT space is different. In those circles, participants find trust, confidentiality, and respect. Surrounded by others who share similar wounds and regrets, they can be safely vulnerable. My own experience was that this allowed me to feel comfortable enough to share my thoughts and insights with the group, which allowed me to grow as a person.

The most impactful things KidCAT taught me were the concept of triggers and that anger is a secondary emotion. For years, I reacted to situations out of anger, frustration, or defensiveness, without understanding why. KidCAT helped me trace those intense reactions to early life experiences, moments when I felt fear, rejection, disrespect, or powerlessness. I began to understand that my anger wasn’t about what was happening in the present, but about old issues I had never resolved. That awareness helped me take responsibility for my emotions instead of blaming others. It’s all about accountability.

Through guided exercises and honest conversations, I started identifying patterns in my relationships. I used to struggle with boundaries, either letting people walk all over me or shutting them out completely. KidCAT taught me the importance of healthy boundaries and how to say “no” without guilt, how to advocate for my needs, and how to respect the needs of others. KidCAT trains us to build friendships and relationships based on honesty, trust, and mutual respect. Perhaps most importantly, KidCAT helped me, and I’m sure many others, get in touch with emotions, not just the emotions I used to feel most comfortable with, like anger or pride, but also sadness, fear, shame, and even joy. I learned that emotions aren’t weaknesses; they’re signals. They’re also messages from within that tell us when something needs attention or care. By naming my emotions and expressing them in healthy ways, I am more self-aware.

To anyone incarcerated who feels stuck, angry, or broken, I want to say this: there’s a path to healing. It takes courage and strength to look inward. It takes strength to be vulnerable, but it’s worth it. KidCAT teaches that true freedom isn’t just about release from prison, but about freeing yourself from the emotional chains you’ve carried for too long.

Just like everyone else, I still have much self-work to do. Healing is a journey, not a destination. It’s not easy to face the truth about yourself. But when you do it in a space that’s rooted in compassion, accountability, and growth, like in KidCAT, you don’t just survive. You begin to heal. 

I’d also like to recognize the dedication and compassion of the KidCAT facilitators. Their tireless effort, and commitment to bettering others and themselves, is very inspiring.